When a prominent hair model and actor wanted to become President, Advomatic played up Mitt Romney's fake family waspy pedigree with this blog: The Five Brothers Blog.

As each of Mittens' foppish spawn drove around Iowa begging the plebs to vote for their sovereign, our website kept tally of all the cute anecdotes.

Tagg, Ben, Thumper, Josh, and Muffy served our nation -- not so much military service in a war they support kinda way -- by driving a van around and seeing the tourist traps of Western Iowa.

Republican nominee Saint John Sidney McCain III had a problem:

He was worried: How can he convince Americans that he is not going to continue the policies of the most loathed President to ever serve two terms, when, in fact, he IS running for George W. Bush's third term.

Our strategy team's suggestion: Lie.

So far so good.

When the delightfully eloquent Ann Coulter needed a new website for her latest masterpiece of thought and insight, Advomatic dropped the greasy over-sized turkey leg we were gnawing on, scrambled into our horse-drawn carriages, careened away from our Carpathian Mountaintop castle cafeteria to get to work for the perfect Republican party spokeswoman, whom almost-Jesus-loving Mitt Romney calls "just great."

Michelle Malkin is our "diversity" client (thank you tax break!)

Considered by her fans to be Buckingham to Ann Coulter's Richard of York... or, how about the Statler to Coulter's Waldorf... okay, Malkin is "the other crazy harpy" to Coulter's "crazy harpy." Either way, Michelle Malkin is tremblingly happy to work with Advomatic and we'll let her stay happy.

When a staffer specializing in blogs and online communications for the Connecticut for Lieberman party campaign approached us to help with the hosting infrastructure for the Connecticut Senatorial race we couldn't help but be a little skeptical. The Nutmeg state is not known for its conservative roots; after all the Democrat Party had just nominated wack-job pinko liberal anti-troop terrorist appeaser Ned Lamont to represent them! But, after inquiring further, and learning Republican Joe Lieberman had switched to the pro-Lieberman party, the "Connecticut for Lieberman Party", we jumped at the opportunity. Advomatic believes that every self-serving politician deserves to be 'A Party of One' to represent their constituent.

The newest episode of "will this bring down the Bush Administration" is rolling credits (Joe Wilson, you can sit down, Joe) — with nobody harmed save for Irve Lewis "Scooter" Libby Jr., who will soon be granted a commutation cum full presidential pardon and a seat on the Halliburton board once Cheney "gets back to the office."

With this website, Advomatic helped Irve "Scooter" Libby Jr. raise large sums of cash from Joe Lieberman's friends for new Coach luggage that will accompany him on the move from his Georgetown penthouse to his new palace of human skulls in Dubai.

When a small town Colorado minister asked for help in building a site promoting himself so that he might bring more men (and women) to his flock, we jumped at the chance. We met him at a local motor lodge to go over the spec., the room was crummy (coffee maker was busted), but after a while with his devilish good looks and his engaging personality, we had no choice but to give this virile minister eight-inches of a throbbing, powerful, website.

Charles Johnson's right-wing blog is a brave exercise in the new media. The media where adjudication of fact is as quaint as the Geneva Conventions.

Some moments we have been proud to hold LGF's dress train were times when Johnson and his community bravely stood up with Reaganesque gusto to the liberal encyclopedia-brandishing "reality police."

Columnists including Republican party spokesman Bill O'Reilly and Dick Morris contribute to NewsMax, making this important news and commentary website akin to the Drudge* Report but with more "reporters." NewsMax breaks many stories about the liberal cabal and our conservative superstar hero geniuses who fight them to preserve His glorious empire.

In a brilliant evolution of infotainment, Richard Mellon Scaife's NewsMax literally injects paid advertising into stories like this one from May, 2005:

Outraged by the endless production line in liberal Hollywood of boy bands with pro-gay Lance Bassesque sleeper cells, Advomatic discovered this delightful bubblegum pop girl group, 14 yr-old twins as pure as snow, named Lamb and Lynx Gaede who were in need of a neat-o, whiz-bang website.

As the site says, "Within the fold of White Nationalist Rock, one of the only true alternatives to the corporate music and recording business, these two little girls have filled thousands of their fans with love and hope for the future."

When the United States of America, LLC outsources the Constitutionally mandated functions of the Department of Defense to wage war and rebuild, there is only one company in the destruction/construction biz they consistently turn to again and again and again and again. Each time Halliburton CEO Dick Cheney points his Death Star at a spot on the map and then needs infrastructure rebuilding over the course of several years at an hourly rate 150,000 times more expensive than government costs, Halliburton CEO Cheney turns to, well, Halliburton.

Advomatic is following in a proud family tradition of helping mercenaries - as our forefathers built a website for German royalty to sell the services of their American-Colonist-head-lopping-off Hessians for hire to the British Army in 1777.

Advomatic also worked with Byzantine Emperor (Μιχαήλ Δ' ο Παφλαγών) in 1003 who contracted out to Varangian Tribe of Vikings for their personal guard. The Norsemen's mission was to protect the Emperor, his court and suppress insurgencies with random beheadings.

Awesome.